“Hey MDR, what’s wrong with you?”


It’s time for explanations and a short Q&A

Do you know the mental state of procrastination? For weeks I wanted to write an article about the last months, but I was so overwhelmed from everything around me. And the thing is, if you wait too long, the mountain to climb will even get higher.
As I know that the attention span for reading long texts has gotten shorter in times of Tiktok, I will structure the most important things and questions in Q&A style. I hope this will reach everyone who needs long overdue answers.

Are fussphantasie and cc-feet slowly dying?

Short answer: No!
w2Long answer: Some of you still remember my 10-year celebration movie. Unfortunately it was deleted by Youtube, but it is still online at Vimeo in german language. At the end I’ve said, that I will go on until I’m old and grey, sitting in a wheelchair and whatelse. I was serious about this, so no, I won’t give up my little babies. Granted, at fussphantasie isn’t happening very much right now, because I simply can’t keep it up. More on the reasons later.

Why can’t I register? Why is my account inactive?

Short answer: I had to delete every account registered from July until November. Please register again if you are still interested.
Long answer: This kind of registration process is heavily annoying! For you as visitors and for me as the only owner of fussphantasie and cc-feet. Over the span of the last 3-4 years I had to implement more filters, more check-ups, more of everything. Just because there were very few people who tried to hack the shop, checkout with stolen credit cards and guys who tried to make a shady business with my clips.
This is internet and I can’t control everything and everyone, I know that. The only possibility for me to protect me and my stuff is to deny access for suspicios registrations. This includes anonymous or fake registrations and even more, as a last resort, denying access for whole countries (Yes Russia, unfortunately I’m speaking of you and your proxy servers) and certain IP ranges.
However, it doesn’t stop there. Denying an account isn’t only ticking a box. It means way too often that I’m getting lots of mails with explanations, discussions and verbal insults. Not once in a week, this happens almost on a daily basis. Result was, I didn’t check my account anymore – which is a no-go in the business world. You simply can’t ignore your customers.
But my mental and physical health state didn’t allow me for more. It was too much at this point, so I chose to run away and keep my eyes closed. As we all know, ignoring doesn’t solve problems. So now we’re here and I’m writing this essay – hoping to keep the damage as low as possible.

Will there ever be another Under Feet clip?

32b_xShort answer: In 2023 no. In 2024 I hope so (very much).
Long answer: My health condition doesn’t allow me to plan far long ahead. I can do some things, but those things rely on spontaneous decisions. If I’m feeling well enough, I can do some stuff. For example I’ve captured a new Shoe Store Compilation at cc-feet. And there is another project I’ve done silently in the last weeks, which I will release this month.
Let me be clear: I’m missing the UF projects as much as you do. Fritz is also longing for a new session, we talk regularly about it.

New models?

Short answer: I hope.
Long answer: I hope… :D
No, let’s be serious. Fussphantasie started with photo shootings only and gained many models in a very short time. I was so manic about it that my only goal was to get new photos from as many girls as possible. Times have changed, Instagram and Tiktok took over and most of the guys today want video clips. At the same time the girls got more and more concerns with privacy. Plus the whole scandals and movements with sexism, metoo and such. Sometimes I get the feeling that our passion for feet (or fetish, if you want) isn’t quite accepted anymore as it was 20 years ago. And, I can’t deny this, I’m getting older too. I don’t want to be called a “weird old creep” when I ask younger girls for photo shootings. I will try for sure, but I don’t know what will happen.

MDR, what is wrong with you?

Last year I’ve written a german article here about my status and plans. I was short before going into a psychosomatic hospital and I’ve explained some things which happened in the past.
The reality is: I’m not feeling better now. I got kicked out of the hospital too early because I’ve raised my voice against an incapable doctor. So I was at point zero again.
In addition to some severe depressive phases, my good old anxiety disorder kicked in again. I have this since my teenage years, but I had a very good life for many years until my first and second heart attack happened. I didn’t make a mystery about that, but my life changed drastically after these incidents. Then my best friend and mother died and Corona kicked in. Ever since that I was lost completely and I couldn’t catch up anymore by myself.
This year I was two times in hospital again to rule out a possible intestine cancer disease. Gladly everything was ok, but I have symptoms nevertheless. This is the main reason why I can’t make appointments or plan ahead for long. I have to rely on a good day and then some things are possible. But that’s not very lifeworthy at all. This is highly annoying, frustrating and it slowly took my complete self confidence away.
In a few weeks I will visit another psychosomatic hospital, hopefully with more competent doctors. I mean, this mess can’t go on forever, something has to change.

w3As a side note: I had many down times the last two years. And whenever I thought “this is the end” I got solace from my passion/fetish. Quite funny, because socks and feet rescued me in my lonely childhood. Now they do it again.
As you are foot lovers too, I’m quite sure that most of you understand what I mean. Mainly our fetish developed as a substitute for something, at least in my case, and even in the worst times, when everything else seems to float away, the passion stays.
As weird as it may sound, but I’m very glad and thankful for this <3

Now I hope some questions are answered. I’d like to say sorry for all this anger and frustration I might have caused in you due to my own weakness. Right now I’m lying on the floor and trying to stand up. I need to gain some muscles that keep my head up again.

Thank you for reading and hopefully understanding.